Happy Tuesday #Jontourage,
Welcome back to the “Classy Gent Chronicles”, where staying classy is the only way to be. In this week’s edition, I had to fight tooth and nail to get rid of this toxic trait (and yes that photo is me under the covers lol)...
For most of my life, I have seen the world and the people in it for what they can be. I loved the thought of potential because it’s exciting to see how beautiful something can become with time and love. When you are a visionary, you are always thinking about the future of things and how great they can be down the road. However, when you see things and people for what they can be, you often neglect what’s right in front of you. Despite how beautiful someone’s or something’s future can be, their present may be very ugly and that’s not something I choose to continue ignoring. I found myself staying in situations or around people longer than I should be waiting for something that may never happen. “One day” doesn’t always come…
I often made excuses for the poor behavior of others/bad situations in hopes that with more time and loyalty, things will work my favor. This trait I possessed held me back probably more than any other trait I had. I felt I could save anybody regardless of the situation or the person. I always made it about what I could do better to make the situation better not realizing that the ultimate factor in someone’s growth is THEM…not you. You cannot make someone more loyal, considerate, helpful or caring. I remember my role in your life is to be there, not to fix you. It is okay to desire mutually beneficial situations. If you leave the interactions constantly feeling drained, overwhelmed or frustrated, you are probably in the wrong situation.
You deserve to get something out of what you invest your time into and that’s not anything you should feel bad for wanting. For a little while, I forgot I had a choice in how long I choose to stay in a situation. Remember you ALWAYS have a choice. The day you give your power away is the day your spirit dies.
As I am learning to see situations and people for exactly what it is and not what it can be, it has made me a lot more aware of my surroundings. When I see someone’s true colors, I accept it now and adapt accordingly. Potential is great but you can’t live off of money that is “on the way”. Potential is great but you shouldn't eat “food that is still being cooked”. Sometimes it is easier to cut your losses than it is to wait around for something to change. My advice is for you to decide how much time you’re willing to give it. God WILL replace every toxic person and situation but you have to take the first step and move on from it.
As I prepare for turning 30 in July, I promised myself I was going to surround myself with better quality people. Not in the sense of people with more money or people who like nice things but instead, better quality meaning progressive-thinking individuals. Those who have a winner’s mindset. Those who don’t blame others. Those who take pride in their work and themselves. You are a reflection of who you are around so why now elevate your life by elevating your circle. Hope this helps at least one individual...
Moral of the story: Stop chasing who/what “isn’t” and begin embracing who/what “is”.
Remember, in order to live out your dreams, you have to think it, feel it, live it! Until next time, stay classy...
For more Classy Gent Chronicles blog post, be sure to visit https://www.authorjon.com/blog
Jonathan C. Harris is no stranger to leadership, hard work, or success. At the age of ten years old, he earned the right to be a guest weatherman for a day on Fox 5 DC News. He has already received over 100 honors and awards including Forty Under 40 for Prince George’s County, MD, TEDx Talk speaker, American College Personnel Association (ACPA) Outstanding Men’s Program, high school Valedictorian and the Kiwanis Club Citizenship Award. Raised in Fort Washington, Maryland, he has served in leadership positions his entire life, from being the manager of the school store in elementary school to the president of the Homelessness Awareness Club in middle school to the president of the National Honor Society in high school.